By Dave Evensen
The Republic
The strange man who wandered into the kitchen the first day of Denise Bottorff’s new job in 1976 terrified her. She swore she’d never go back.
But that new, green Dodge Aspen she longed for wasn’t free, and her mother’s voice, saying she’s no quitter, wouldn’t leave her mind.
So the next day Bottorff, then 21, returned to Muscatatuck State Hospital and Training Center, where she continued her job in the dietary department.
Days turned into years, and the place she feared evolved into a place she loved. Bottorff, like others who have worked at Muscatatuck, grew to fondly call the residents there her kids.
Muscatatuck, however, is now a memory for Bottorff. She left this fall after working there for 28 years. She could have stayed until the end, but didn’t want to watch it close.
“It was an experience,” Bottorff said of her years at Muscatatuck, from her home in Nebraska, near Butlerville. “It’s one I would never trade for anything.”
She works now as a guard at a transitional facility in Madison for women ending long prison sentences.
Bottorff said four other former Muscatatuck employees — a developmental service technician, a secretary and two work clerks — started as guards at the facility at the same time.
Other former Muscatatuck employees, she said, are at a state hospital nearby.
“I love it,” she said, of her new job. “The girls are good ... I’m not just a guard. I’m there for them.”
At 50, Bottorff added, she feels lucky to have a new job. Since it’s a state position, her seniority carried over from Muscatatuck.
She’s had a hard time letting Muscatatuck go, however. Bottorff still often drives the 10 minutes to the center to see old friends and residents.
“I feel it’s still my home,” she said. “Those people out there were some of the best I’ve ever met.”
Muscatatuck is sad now, Bottorff said, since it’s now so quiet. She said she’d go back in an instant if it reopened, however.
“It’s not just a job,” Bottorff said. “You felt like you were giving yourself.
“Attitudes, behaviors. It was just something to cherish. It just made you feel whole.”
She feels the state did not go about closing Muscatatuck the right way, and thinks the process should have been slower.
The women she works with now have similar types of problems as residents and employees leaving Muscatatuck.
“A lot of (the women) have a lot of anxieties, since they’ve been in (prison) so long,” Bottorff said.
As she works, she added, she carries a little bit of Muscatatuck with her.
“Life isn’t as bad as we make it sometimes,” Bottorff said, reflecting on what she’s learned while taking care of people. “I wish them all the best.”
Portions © 2004, The Republic, Columbus, Indiana