Under the best circumstances, intimate relationships are built on trust and mutual respect.
And if we are among the lucky ones, it's hard to understand how this love gets twisted into fear -- how women and men make up the 53,203 victims who seek help in the United States each day. A National Network to End Domestic Violence survey reports of those victims, 844 of them are Hoosiers seeking help.
But then there are the unnumbered people who never seek help out of shame or cultural barriers -- women and men who don't speak English or might not have documents to prove their citizenship.
Where do they go, and, most worrisome of all, how many in our own community suffer in silence?
Liliana Quintero, executive director of the Latino Health Coalition of Elkhart County, said a combination of cultural alienation and lack of available bilingual resources prevent Latinos from seeking the help they need.
"I'm pretty sure that there are more cases then we know outside," said Quintero. "If they go to a place and at that place they can't interact with anyone because they don't know the language, they feel they have to shut up and not say anything."
Quintero also notices the issue of legal residency keeps many people from seeking outside help against abuse -- she's noticed both women and men with "legal" partners will contact the coalition and report being coerced into silence.
"There's a lot of pressure around that," Quintero said.
Ruby Fleming, a program coordinator for the Latino Coalition Against Domestic and Sexual Violence based in Indianapolis, added that 80 percent of the agency's cases stemmed from one documented partner abusively controlling the undocumented other.
Vanessa Kelleybrew of iFIT, formerly Family Services of Elkhart County, said the Women's Shelter iFIT operates offers bilingual staff members for women who need help, even though Quintero reported Latinas who contact the coalition sometimes don't find this to be the case.
When it comes to tapping other Elkhart County resources, the choices are few, save "a few mental health professionals."
"When somebody calls we don't have many choices to offer them," Quintero said. "There's no long-term solution, basically."
Fleming added that lack of education and miscommunication from Indiana service providers causes the majority of abused people to believe they have no rights.
"They have rights to call police," Fleming said, "get a police report and get a protective order," regardless of immigration status.
Elkhart Lt. Ed Windbigler said several incidents occur around the city where a neighbor will report abuse or fighting amongst a Latino family -- members of the family in trouble seldom contact police.
"My experience is that Latinas will put up with a lot more than African American or white ladies will," Windbigler said. "That's just how their culture is."
Windbigler added that local police will protect an abused person regardless of whether they have documentation.
"We're not looking for undocumented people," Windbigler said. "If they have a problem, please call us. It's our job to protect people if they're asking for help."
Undocumented people also are eligible to file protective orders against their partners without fear of deportation -- this year, the U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services will begin granting a special "U Visa" to victims of certain serious crimes who cooperate with law enforcement.
Latino women or men seeking help should call the National Domestic Hotline (which offers bilingual service) at (800) 799-SAFE, or visit www.ndvh.org/espanol/help/index.html.